amusing" while inventing a number of scenarios whereby the coins in question were too insignificant to record. Of course, since the coins were taken out of Britain without any record, it is impossible to know how useful the coins may have been for the historical and archaeological record. Let us hope that Mr. Hooker's resentment for the need to record finds in Britain does not reflect wider views in the ancient coin collecting community in North America. After all, the scheme is meant to preserve information that would otherwise be destroyed by commercial or self-interest. If, as the ACCG has constantly argued, the PAS is the perfect solution to the looting problem, then why make excuses for profiteering that does not take the time to record finds when the PAS is available?

The ancient coin collecting and dealing communities are very small indeed and various classes of dealers and suppliers often have close personal and business relationships. Sellers like those discussed, and their suppliers, will no doubt have conducted business with dealers and/or collectors associated with the ACCG. The advertisements for uncleaned coins and unrecorded British finds were made on lists owned and/or moderated by ACCG members. Should not the ACCG be expending more energy on establishing proactive market guidelines and due diligence practices that address the negative effects of an indiscriminate market than it does on vilifying archaeologists and concocting disinformation to argue to the public that ancient coins are not archaeologically significant objects even when excavated in situ?

While touting the potential of the PAS as a model for other "source countries," the ACCG leadership resists promoting or advocating due diligence by dealers and collectors. Schemes like the PAS could preserve much information that is otherwise lost by casual hobbyists, but information continues to be lost so long as consumers (i.e. dealers and collectors) are not holding their suppliers (especially bulk suppliers) accountable. Indeed, some PAS officials have expressed irritation and dismay at the way the dealer lobby has used the PAS in its agenda.

Is it time to practice what is being preached.

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This piece is excerpted from Philip J. Cunninghams manuscript of his forthcoming book, Tiananmen Moon. Interested readers can see more at Cunninghams website.

By Philip J. Cunningham

For a few days there it seemed that the successful student march of May 4 would be the last of the big demos and soon everyone would be back on campus attending classes again. Railing against this rather pleasant and natural inclination, strident wall posters at Shida and Beida called for continuing the student strike. One of the more florid campus wall posters that I managed to snap a photo of was a florid eulogy to the Great Hall of the People as a symbol of representative rule. The dark message, written on May 5, 1989 was at odds with the general euphoria in the wake of the May 4 March, for it predicted an outcome with blood flowing down Changan Boulevard. Brushed in ink on a large sheet of paper, written with such literary flourish that I needed help to decipher it, the poem was signed by an anonymous author who went by the name, The Wild One.*Drawing blood on Changan Jie until the dawn dawns red, smashing to bits the bona fide dream of the people*.

On the morning of May 10, the student-rigged loudspeakers at the center of the Beijing University campus started crackling with a call to action. A Beida physics student explained they were calling on other schools to join Beida students in a new form of protest with Chinese characteristics: the bicycle demonstration!

We sat on our bikes under a tree near the front gate of Beida to observe the hatching of this new and unusual type of protest. The "marchers" rolled in from all directions, mostly walking their bicycles due to the utter congestion. Like earlier protests, which used patriotic anthems as a cover for covert political action, the demo on wheels could hide in plain sight in a city of a million tinkling bicycles.

The tree-lined road leading to the main gate on campus was by now attracting black bicycles like crows, watching and waiting for a sign to take flight en masse.

The long-legged Chen Li shifted restlessly on her bicycle as her mind wrestled with indecision. It seemed that she had almost made up her mind to join the demonstration when some annoying static over the student broadcast system brought to mind another problem.

Just who were the so-called student leaders? They hadnt been voted into office. They had just sort of seized the initiative. Chen Li bristled at the idea of taking the lead from such presumptuous peers, wondering instead what her teachers would counsel. The problem with the student movement, it seemed to her, was that it was run by students.

It was one o'clock, at least a thousand bicycles were amassed on the tree-lined road leading to South Gate, but there was no discernible movement in a forward direction. Then a few minutes after the hour, a sudden crescendo of tinkling bicycle bells alerted us that the pent-up energy of the waiting cyclists was about to be unleashed. To the background of jangling rings, screeching brakes, flopping pedals and soft thud of rubber tires bumping into the spokes of other bicycle wheels, the demonstration creakily commenced.

Beida professors, some of whom lived in apartments near South Gate, were on the scene, talking to students and in some cases actively cheering them on, much to Chen Lis delight. But most of the older campus residents kept their distance. Whether it was the wisdom of age or bitter memories of the Cultural Revolution not yet faded, many of them watched wistfully from the windows and balconies of the ramshackle teacher's dormitories.

All at once, the mass of a million spokes and wheels, greasy chains and kickstands heaved into motion again. Enmeshed in a traffic jam at the starting gate, the metallic parade of creaking, entangled bicycles slowly lurched forward, balanced and propelled by feet, more often on the ground than on pedal. Because it took just a few wobbly bicycles to block a narrow path, the campus gate became a bottleneck, slowing egress even though the security guards did nothing to stop the flow.

Once we rolled off campus and hit the lightly-trafficked streets of Haidian district, the mass of bicycles speeded up in concert, a forward movement that felt truly liberating. All demonstrators, from flag bearers to group leaders, were on mount, so when we finally hit open road, it was possible to race en masse at a flag-whipping speed.

The plan as we understood it was to go around Beijing following the perimeter of the circuitous ring road, to breach Tiananmen Square and then to stage a protest at the Peoples Daily compound on Chaoyang Road, but first we had to join forces with allies from other campuses.

"It's a 40-kilometer circle," I heard someone say, "When we get downtown, just follow the old city wall of Beijing."

Chen Li was well aware of the iconic importance of the route, but she was no hot-headed activist. Unlike some late-joiners who pedaled with double the enthusiasm, she continued to show hesitation and review her options at each main juncture along the way. Twice we pulled out from the convoy at her insistence when it looked like there might be trouble from the police. I appreciated her caution, I was a bit worried myself. But what impressed me more was that she did not fall into lockstep behind the bossy student leaders up front who were by now commanding the metaphorical ten thousand troops. The only thing more surprising than the speed with which a handful of rash students took control was the willingness of so many intelligent individuals to become followers.

True, the march would not have taken wing if everyone adopted the cautious wait-and-see attitude the two of us did. And some of the students leaders at Beida, Wang Dan in particular, were considered to be thoughtful and reasonable, but the rapidity with which Chinese students fell into line and accepted group think troubled me nonetheless.

But as we cruised breezily down the car-free streets, meeting up with other wheeled university contingents, a kind of ragtag mass euphoria built with each addition to the ranks.




When at last we got close to Changan Boulevard, the turn to Tiananmen was blocked by police. Word had it that the police had been firm but not unfriendly, and we saw no fighting or confrontation. The traffic police were just doing their job, cordoning off the section of Chang'an Boulevard that ran past the leadership headquarters at Zhongnanhai on the way to Tiananmen. If the men in uniform had been sticklers about not allowing a left turn towards the Square, they showed little concern for what we demonstrators might do elsewhere. That was someone else's responsibility.

Beijing's grid-like layout of large east/west avenues criss-crossed by north/south roads made it nearly impossible to lose one's bearings. It became immediately obvious when we turned south after a feint to the west that we were still headed for Tiananmen after all, only in a roundabout way.

The snakelike chain of cycles doubled back to head for our unspoken destination. Successfully overcoming the police roadblock doubled the good spirits; the collective mood was ecstatic and electric. The indirect route to the Square offered no obstacle to our forward motion. It was hard to believe that the traffic police were so dim-witted as to fall for the ruse, it seems more likely they were following orders to the letter without enthusiasm. Once they had stopped us from turning east onto Chang'an Boulevard, they didnt seem to care where we went. It was as if they put up a perfunctory show of opposition to the march, not in real opposition, but so as not to get in trouble for not doing their job. Bureaucracy at its best!

When we got to broad Qianmen Avenue we veered east, making a nosedive to Tiananmen, as inexorably as if pulled by gravity. It was here, as the rows of onlookers thickened, as the cyclists pedaled harder, that Chen Li heard a variation of *laowai paobu* that she was kind enough to share with me. What were people saying at the sight of me today? *Laowai qi zixingche! * --Whitey rides the bike!

As we picked up speed, spirits soared. The flying wedge leading the pack thinned out to about five bicycles abreast, stretching the malleable procession in length. It was a race to beat the police to the Square, or so it felt as we hit our clunky bike pedals at an accelerating clip. This kinetic frenzy got the adrenaline going, there was no stopping our unauthorized procession now. Whatever residual indecisiveness my companion might have had was largely overcome by the inspiring sight of fellow cyclists boldly careening forward. Butterflies in the stomach took flight as we made the final invigorating plunge towards the Square.

As the bicycle procession reached the southwestern outskirts of the Tiananmen area, I couldn't imagine pulling out, even if there were police waiting. I didn't want to miss the thrill of streaming across the symbolic plaza in this swift, fluid convoy of thousands, holding aloft fluttering flags, wheeling it for free speech.

The mad dash across Tiananmen Square was the high point, a defiant burst of energy propelled us clear across the forbidden ground in a giant, diagonal slash. There were pockets of urban well-wishers and curious rural tourists who out of friendly support, or fear of speeding bicycles, stepped back from the bicycle course to form a line of observers on both sides. We sped along like chessboard knights across the graph-like matrix of the Square, starting in the lower left hand corner going two steps north, one step east, then one step north and two steps east, finally exiting on the upper right hand side.

The vivid pathway cut by us cyclists swooshing across the Square was volatile and transient; it lasted only as long as the last bicycle in the procession. Banners strapped to bicycles and some huge red flags were held high in the air, balanced deftly by skilled cyclists. The way the flags whipped in the wind created an air of excitement. The red headbands, representing blood, rebellion and speed, were perfect for the course. How else could we identify our cyclists in a city of several million bicycles?

From the vantage point of a gliding bicycle, it was a magnificent scene. Before us and behind us, red flags and school banners lashed the air and unfurled in the jet stream of rushing cycles. This gave the illusion that flags and banners, some strapped to bicycles, others held aloft by skilled cyclists, were flying above the crowd under their own power, like the magical brooms of the sorcerer's apprentice.

As the vanguard zig-zagged in search of openings through the crowd ahead of us, I suddenly had to wonder. Where did all the spectators come from, anyway? At least some of the onlookers appeared to be supporters because they lined up, deliberately holding up traffic it seemed, to create a protective corridor for the demonstrators to slip through. By the time we reached the northeast quadrant of the Square, the banks of spectators were four or five deep on each side, shouting in unison and clapping in support.

The mood was defiant but confident, not only because the police had backed off, but because there was a sense of safety due to the tacit support of townspeople and the growing camaraderie of fellow cyclists. Thanks to the exhilarating movement across the square, all my doubts, and I think those of Chen Li, about whether or not one should get involved in such an event vanished. I, for one, was exactly where I wanted to be.

The speedy rivulet of bicycles got dammed up at Nanchizi intersection just beyond the Square, while the vanguard of group facilitators dealt with some obstruction and conferred on which way to go. Tires bumped against tires, and the mobile procession slowed, scrunched up into a immobile mass of protesters, some dismounting, others resting with feet on the ground for balance. Then the signal to continue reached us and was duly passed along, one voice at a time until what seemed like a million shiny spokes were soon creaking back in motion, revolving down Chang'an Boulevard, transporting the saddled riders to the diplomatic section of town.

And thats when we realized we werent alone.

Look, over there! Foreign journalists!

As we rolled past the Beijing Hotel we could see foreign film crews scrambling to set up their cameras to capture this unusual and uniquely Chinese demonstration on film. Unlike the well-documented marches of April 27 and May 4, it seemed as if the foreign press had been caught unprepared by this one. But that was a relief in a way, for cameras have an unnatural effect on people on both sides of the lens. As the brusque men with big cameras scrambled up their ladders, taking aim at us, I could sense a kind of shy pride laced with a touch of humiliation. We were targets being hunted by big roving lenses, reduced to a kind of native wildlife.

It was hard to determine if being on TV was good news or bad news. Had the press been tipped off by the government about an imminent crackdown, or had they been tipped off by the students about the illegal rally?

We kept our eyes on the road, generally ignoring the cameras and sped along on our way. I heard student cyclists complain that a bunch of journalists had shown up the other day at the last minute, when it looked like the police might stage a crackdown, and had they left just as quickly when the crisis passed. To see newsmen arrive on the scene was a bit like sighting vultures; they were just doing their job, of course, but their appearance was often a sign of trouble.

So what was I to make of BBCs offer of a few days freelance work--interpreting, taking news crews around Beijing in preparation for the Gorbachev visit a few days hence? I had no press accreditation, so it was a strictly off the books arrangement, a few days work at the local hire rate. I had to wonder if running around with the foreign media was a worthwhile opportunity or mere opportunistic voyeurism, a professional way of looking for trouble.

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Just like any trip to China, you would need a Chinese Visa to be allowed to enter Guangzhou. Since I had to renew my passport this year and it took the DFA a pretty long time before they finally delivered it to me, we were a bit worried that we won't be able to get our Chinese Visa on time. Luckily, our travel agency told us to relax as they took care of the tedious legwork. However, to avoid getting stress and spending unneccessarily, I would suggest to allot at least two weeks processing time.

Being budget travellers, we carefully canvassed all of the possible flights and transportation mode that will take us from Manila to Guangzhou. Note that only Cebu Pacific flies directly to Guangzhou however not on a daily basis.

Finally, we decided to fly to Hong Kong then to take the KCR Kowloon-Guangzhou Train that has 12 trips daily and travels for only an hour and 50 minutes. The transfer was also a breeze! From the Hong Kong International Airport, we took the Airport Express train to the Kowloon station. There, we looked for the K1 Airport Express shuttle bus that drove us directly to the Hung Hom station which is also where we will ride the KCR train to Guangzhou. Cost per ticket is HKD190.

Of course, another way to get to Guangzhou is to take a direct flight which will land at the Baiyun International Airport or to take the bus from the Hong Kong International Airport which will cost you less but will take approximately 4 long hours before you finally reach Guangzhou.

We took a short nap during the train ride but were awaken with the shuffling sound of our co-passengers. I can't believe we're finally in Guangzhou, China.

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Quote-
"Opening the Door:
Save the Chimps Gives New Life to Florida Retirement

The Satya Interview with Carole Noon

Today, about 1,200 chimpanzees reside in U.S. laboratories. Three
hundred research chimpanzees recently discovered a new life of
retirement under the care of Dr. Carole Noon, a biological
anthropologist and advocate for captive and free-living chimpanzees.
Dr. Noon's specialty is in chimpanzee re-socialization and is the
founder and director of Save the Chimps (STC), a sanctuary
where rescued laboratory chimpanzees can live out their lives
in comfort and safety.

STC's facility in Fort Pierce, Florida currently cares for 21
chimpanzees formerly used by the U.S. Air Force. In addition,
STC acquired custody of 266 chimpanzees in Alamogordo,
New Mexico, former test subjects of the Coulston Foundation,
a biomedical laboratory with a notorious record of animal
abuse and neglect. Construction of additional habitats for
the Coulston chimps is currently underway in Fort Pierce,
and until all the chimpanzees have retired to Florida, Dr. Noon
splits her time between New Mexico and Florida.

Dr. Carole Noon took some time out of her (vegetarian)
lunch with the chimps to share with Sangamithra Iyer her
thoughts and stories about providing a new life filled with
social and environmental enrichment for our rescued next of kin.

For those who don't know, can you give a little background
on the Air Force's use of chimpanzees?
In the early 1950s, the Air Force went to Africa and collected a
bunch of babies and brought them back to the U.S., which meant
of course killing all the chimp moms in their path. I don't know
how many they collected altogether, I think 65 of the babies lived.
The Air Force put the chimps through tests, such as spinning
them in giant centrifuges, putting them in decompression chambers,
and inducing sleeplessness to see what would happen to humans
when they went into space. By the 1970s, the Air Force had obviously
been to space, had conquered its goal, so they started leasing these
chimps out to biomedical research, which they did for the next 27
years, until they finally dumped them at the Coulston Foundation.

Can you tell us about the origin of Save the Chimps and how
you got involved in efforts to retire chimpanzees from research?
In 1997 the U.S. Air Force announced that they were getting rid of
their chimpanzees, and they threw them in the dumpster known as
the Coulston Foundation. I had put in a bid and didn't get any of
them, but I really had nothing but a good idea at the time. So then
we (STC aka Center for Captive Chimpanzee Care) sued the Air
Force, and got 21 chimpanzees. The others came along when
Coulston went out of business.

How have the Air Force chimps adapted to retirement
in Florida?
They are doing great. They live on an island. They are a family. They
have choices. Now that I've taken over Coulston, I know where these
chimps came from. I know first-hand what kind of life they've led.
They lived in small barren cages with no blankets and no toys. They
ate a diet of nothing but dried monkey chow. Many of them probably
lived alone or at best in pairs. Several of the chimps were breeders.
So they lived alone, except the two or three weeks that they were
put in with another chimpanzee; once they got pregnant, they were
separated again. Basically the lives of some of these females was
living alone, getting pregnant, gestating, giving birth, having the
babies taken away from them; then going through the whole process all
over again.

What is a typical day at the sanctuary in Florida?
Right now they (the chimpanzees) are having a big fight. [Chimps
scream in the background.] It's a funny lunch. For some reason nobody
wants to come in today. Obviously something happened earlier this
morning that we don't know about and they are sorting it out now.

A typical day: We start breakfast at 7:30. We lock them inside, and
we go outside and clean up the island. After breakfast, we lock them
outside, and we go in and clean the cages. Right about now [midday],
we typically have lunch. Again, we lock them inside so we can go outside
and do what we call browse the island. We scatter things like cut-up
lettuce, cherry tomatoes, or sunflower seeds so they can forage for it the
rest of the afternoon. We let them out after lunch. We bring them back
for dinner. It's basically meals and cleaning poop. [Laughs.]

In 2002, Save the Chimps acquired the Coulston facility
in New Mexico. I know you've made a lot of changes to
better the conditions there until you can transfer the
chimps to Florida. What are the conditions like in
New Mexico now for the chimpanzees? It's interesting
because everyone is thinking that their lives aren't going
to get better until they move to Florida. Quite frankly,
their lives are so improved now, they probably think they are in
heaven. They aren't even going to believe it when they move
here (Florida) and get all this space.

When I got here, you had 54 chimps living alone in one
of the buildings. In the other buildings, you had small
same sex groups, because they didn't want to breed, but
they didn't do birth control either.

One of the first things we did was vasectomize the
males, so now we have groups of males and females.
There was a group of nine under the age of four; we've
integrated two babies per group. Every group now has
old people, young people, babies, teenagers. It's a real family group now.

We've done almost half a million dollars' worth of renovation
just to make it livable. This includes putting windows and doors
between cages so that chimps who were once separated by a solid
cement wall could finally see each other and eventually meet each
other. Again, they used to eat nothing but monkey chow, now
they get three meals a day. They get blankets and toys. We have parties.
Our Halloween party is coming up.

When do you hope to bring the New Mexico chimps
to Florida?
Well the hurricanes backed us up by about a month. I'm figuring
that by the end of July 2005, we'll have most of the chimps moved.

How did the chimps in Florida react during the recent
hurricanes?
They slept through both of them. [Laughs.] They were completely
nonplussed. It was interesting because they had to know something
was going on because we put the shutters up, and we brought supplies
into the buildings. The buildings went dark and finally the electricity
went out so the fans went off. They didn't think anything of it.

But your facilities were intact? Yes. Well I knew evacuation was
never going to be an option, so we pretty much built these to be
hurricane bunkers.

My understanding is that you have the largest social group of
chimpanzees and the largest enclosure in the States.
We have a group of 26 in New Mexico and that is the largest group.
The social group we have now in Florida is 21. It certainly is the largest
enclosure in the States.

I've kind of modeled this place after African sanctuaries, where
you put large groups in large outdoor enclosures. Traditional
thinking in the U.S. has been that seven or eight is a big
group. People worry about how many males you can have
in a group. I think there are seven adult males in this group.

Can you cite some of the challenges in creating these
social groups?
You know there is a mystique about introducing chimps. I don't
know where it started, and how it gets perpetuated. Quite frankly,
you watch how two chimps act behind the bars and then you
can make a pretty good guess if they'll get along. Either
they are fighting between the bars or they are playing.
If they are playing and grooming, then you open the door.
And that is pretty much the role of the human being.
You open the door. The chimps walk through the door
and do all the rest. I think I can say, every time I've opened
a door, they've gladly walked through it. They are so ready
to get on with their lives.

Would you like to share a story of a particular
individual there?
I have a story about a chimpanzee named Tarzan. He lived in
that Coulston building where I found 54 chimps living alone.
He was born in Africa, so he's about 42 years old. He was
used as a sperm donor. He was the father of maybe 15 or
20 children. We have all of his offspring, which is pretty
interesting because this family circle is closing in on us.
Tarzan lived in this building which we now call the
dungeon because it was so depressing. We all loved Tarzan,
but it's hard to know anything about a chimp when that
chimp sits alone in a cage.

Over the years I've been taking in more chimps. Five
of these chimps are ex-pets ex-pets are incredibly hard
to work with because they come with all kinds of attitude,
because they've been pampered, because they don't believe
they are just a chimp, and because they haven't been
around other chimps so they don't even know how to talk
to each other. So this group always had arguing going on,
and it's been a nightmare trying to get them together. I
introduced Tarzan to this group, and the next day, suddenly,
this group got along. Suddenly, they stopped fighting.
These chimps would argue over food; if someone looked at
them.

All of that disappeared because Tarzan is such a diplomat.
He's such an incredible leader. I remember Tarzan when
he sat alone in a cage, and now I see Tarzan running a
group like he was born to do it. And the heartbreaking
part of it is that this is the same Tarzan. It's just that
they had him locked up in a cage by himself. He had
all of this locked inside of him. And to watch this guy
bloom and grow and run this group and sort this motley
crew out has just been a wonder to me. And you
can repeat that story 300 more times [with the other chimps].

What are your future goals for Save the Chimps?
To continue doing what we've been doing. We are a 150-acre
construction site. We are going to be moving in 300 chimps.
Those are pretty much my goals. Eventually we will have an
educational facility. We won't be open to the public.
I can't say to these guys, 'you won't be exploited anymore,' and
at the same time be open to the public. The public is incredibly
understanding about this. I think we can have an educational
center with closed circuit TV and anything else you can
think of that would go a long way in educating not only
about these particular chimps, but about chimps in
captivity, and it would be short-sighted not to include
what is happening to chimps in Africa.

What gives you hope for the future?
[Long pause.] This is terrible, but I don't have a whole
lot of hope for chimpanzees in the future. Unless
something radical happens in Africa tomorrow, I don't
see that they have a future. I know you did an interview
with Karl Amman [see September 2003], there's not
much to say after bushmeat is there? We've been
talking about it for how long now? And I don't see
anything changing. But I know that people don't want to
hear that. Writers don't like to write that.

What gives me hope in my own life and my own little
corner of the world is Tarzan and the 300 others like him.

More on Coulston...

On December 15, 2003, toxicologist Dr. Frederick Coulston
died in Alamogordo, NM where he had established his
nonprofit primate research facility, the Coulston Foundation
(TCF). The foundation was formed in 1993 when Coulston
merged several of his for-profit primate research ventures
to create the nation's largest chimpanzee facility. At its peak,
TCF housed over 600 chimpanzees as research subjects.
Chimpanzees and monkeys were used to test chemicals,
drugs, and infectious diseases.

TCF has been formally charged four times by the USDA
for violations of the Animal Welfare Act for inadequate
veterinary care, water deprivation, and the negligent deaths
of ten chimpanzees and four monkeys. These notorious
animal welfare violations and Coulston's public statements
regarding breeding chimpanzees like cattle for research
and potential organ and blood banks made him the target
of many animal activist groups. Animal advocates were
further outraged when the U.S. Air Force placed 111 of their
research chimpanzees in Coulston's care in 1998 instead
of retiring all of them to sanctuaries.

Coulston's animal welfare record didn't improve, and
as a result, the NIH, FDA, and USDA pulled their
funding from his lab. Without these funds, Coulston
was on the verge of bankruptcy and desperately needed
to sell his facility. In 2002, he contacted Dr. Carole Noon,
director of Save the Chimps (STC), and with generous
funding from the Arcus Foundation and others, STC was
able to purchase the New Mexico facility and retire all the
primates from research.S.I.

Story here on Carole's website:
http://www.savethechimps.org/news/article_satya.

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In Iraq, a story of rape, shame and 'honor killing'
Alaa al-Marjani / Associated Press
After prison guards assaulted an Iraqi woman, she turned to her brother for help. But he and society failed her.
By Tina Susman and Caesar Ahmed
April 23, 2009

Reporting from Baghdad -- Sometimes, it's the forbidden stories, the ones people are afraid to tell in full, the ones that emerge only in fragments, that reveal the truth about a place.This is such a story.

It's being told now not because the complete truth is known, but because the story nags at those familiar with its outlines, and because it says as much about Iraq's progress as it does about Iraq's resistance to change.

This much is known:

A young woman imprisoned in Tikrit, north of Baghdad, sent a letter to her brother last summer, appealing for help. The woman, named Dalal, wrote that she was pregnant after being raped by prison guards.

The brother asked to visit her. Guards obliged. The brother walked into her cell, drew a gun and shot his visibly pregnant sister dead.

His goal: to spare his family the taint of a pregnancy out of wedlock, a disgrace in Iraq often averted through so-called honor killings of women by their relatives.

For prison guards, the killing was also a relief.

"They believed that her death would end the case," said a lab worker at Baghdad's central morgue, where the victim's body -- still carrying the 5-month-old fetus -- was sent.

The case might have ended there were it not for the morgue employee, who was determined to see those responsible held to account.

At the employee's insistence, lab workers using freshly acquired DNA-testing equipment drew a sample from the fetus. The prison guards were ordered to submit DNA samples and did so, apparently unaware of the sophistication of the morgue equipment and the people trained to use it.

"They thought we were incapable of figuring it out," said the morgue employee.

The DNA results showed that the father of the unborn baby was a police lieutenant colonel who reportedly supervised guards at the prison.

In another society, the scientific evidence would have led to arrests and prosecution. But this being Iraq, the power wielded by men in uniform and the belief that a raped woman is better off dead combined to cloud the truth.
Months passed after word leaked of the killing on a sweltering summer day. Just as it nagged at the morgue worker, it nagged at us. But how to tell a story that nobody wants told? Everyone had different, usually conflicting, versions of what had happened.

Only the morgue worker's story remained the same, repeated in phone calls and e-mails as summer turned to fall and then winter.

Then, it was time for one of us to leave Iraq. A colleague asked what the reporter's final story would be. There must be one after so long in the country, he insisted.

"Isn't there a story that got away?" he asked.

It became clear that this was it, even if we still didn't know the truth.

About the only thing anyone agrees on is that a young woman was murdered, and that her last days were spent pregnant and worrying about what would happen if she were released into a society that would condemn her for it.

According to a judge in the Tikrit court, the lieutenant colonel implicated by DNA and a police captain also accused in the case were arrested on rape charges but then released for lack of evidence. [LACK OF EVIDENCE? AS IF THE DNA EVIDENCE DID NOT EXIST!] The judge said a third defendant, a police lieutenant, remained in custody. (It is not uncommon in Iraq for police officers to serve as prison guards and supervisors.)

Another Tikrit court official said the lieutenant colonel and captain remained in custody but were transferred from Tikrit to Baghdad. Col. Hatem Thabit, spokesman for the police in Salahuddin province, where the crime was committed, concurred with this account.

Yet other accounts say the matter was settled through tribal justice. The clan of the accused lieutenant colonel paid the woman's family to drop charges, said some people in the area who are familiar with the case but fearful of discussing it openly.

The morgue worker said those involved in the lab testing understood that all three of the police officers were freed.

"I heard the dispute was solved by a tribal ransom," the employee said.

"The issue bothers me a lot. I'm doing my job, and the bad guys are getting back on the street."

There are conflicting reports on the brother's status. Some say he was jailed for killing his sister. Others say he was freed as part of the tribal deal.

As for the slain woman, several accounts say she was in prison not because she was a convicted or accused criminal, but because police wanted to question her brother about something. They thought he would turn himself in to free Dalal. Nobody has been able to explain why police wanted to talk to the brother.

The prison where she was held houses mainly men. There is a small section for female inmates, usually no more than a few at a time. A female guard is supposed to watch over them. No one could explain how the lieutenant colonel was able to do what he did.

Nor could anyone say how Dalal's brother got into her cell with a loaded gun.

"He was supposed to be searched," said Thabit, the police spokesman. "Where he got the weapon, we don't know."

In Iraq, violence against women is a festering but rarely addressed problem. There are no readily available statistics on "honor" killings. The number of rapes reported to police averages five to 10 per month for the entire country, said an official at Baghdad's central morgue, who released the first details of the Tikrit case last summer.

"The actual number of rapes is actually more than we know. There are so many rapes in the prisons, for example," he added before going on to cite the Tikrit case to an Iraqi working for The Times. Realizing he was discussing a case not intended for public consumption, the official urged the reporter not to translate the facts for his English-speaking colleague.

But minutes later, another morgue official and then the lab worker confirmed the case. All asked not to be identified for fear of losing their jobs.
Other workers interviewed during a daylong visit to the morgue, where rape victims are examined, said they had detected an increase in violent crimes against women since the 2003 U.S.-led invasion ushered in a religious conservatism and brought social and economic upheaval. [Oh yeah, blame everything on the Americans, not the cock-eyed culture where male beastiality is taught as the preferred way to have sex over having intercourse with a human woman].

Most are honor killings, said one morgue employee, who a day earlier had received the body of a pregnant woman with her throat slit.

Human rights advocates say many of these homicides are made to look like honor killings to gain leniency for the perpetrators.

"It's a lot worse now," said Ibtisam Hamody Azzawi, a former engineer who runs a small aid organization for abused women from her home in Baghdad.
"Our society witnessed so much war, and this is reflected in the domestic abuse situation."Everything is violence. Even the kids love war," said Azzawi, whose husband, a university dean, was killed by extremists in 2007. [Baloney! This is a direct reflection of a religion that teaches and perpetuates intense hatred for and fear of females].

Much of her time is spent answering knocks on her door or phone calls from women looking for an escape from abusive homes. People find her by word of mouth. She does not tell her neighbors what she does, lest extremists attack her or one of her daughters. [Okay, reporters - how do you think you are protecting this woman by publishing her full name and city of residence in the newspaper? Do you not think Iraqi extremists have access to the internet? DUH! When she and/or her daughers are targeted and killed, will you feel any blood guilt?]

Iraq has no shelters for battered or threatened women, and the war has splintered and displaced families who might have taken in female relatives. Amid the turmoil, homicide has become an easy out for husbands wanting to end their marriages, Azzawi said. It's cheaper than divorce.

"Women get killed, but often it is reported that they are missing," she said. "It's all part of the chaos. Some husbands kill their wives and say maybe she was kidnapped, maybe she died in a bombing."

A husband and wife will have domestic problems. All of a sudden, the wife will disappear.

"At the women's prison in Tikrit, Saturday is visiting day. On a summer Saturday, a brother came to see his sister, her stomach swelling with her unborn child.

She trusted him.

Tina Susman recently returned to the U.S. after a two-year tour in Iraq. Times staff writers Usama Redha and Ned Parker in Baghdad, and special correspondents in Samarra and Tikrit contributed to this report.

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A British travel company, China Holidays, has been given the Queen’s Award for Enterprise for its pioneering work in bringing large numbers of Chinese groups to the UK.
Originally set up in 1997 to take British tourists to China, the company then moved into the undeveloped area of working with the Chinese Government to bring groups of business delegates into this country.
With the opening up of the Chinese economy this has proved very successful, with China Holidays now bringing over 30 Chinese groups a month, and in the last 3 years alone they have brought to the UK over 10,000 business delegates
China Holidays sets up meetings with relevant Government departments, regional development authorities and potential British trading partners for the groups. Whilst the groups are in the UK they generally find some time to learn more about the history and culture of the UK.
China Holidays chairman Carey Fletcher said: “We are delighted that our efforts to build business and cultural links between the two countries have been recognised with this important award. The Chinese economy is becoming increasingly open to UK companies and we will be increasing the numbers of groups we can bring to the UK to develop trading links with this country”.
The company not only helps boost trade between China and the UK by bringing business groups here, but it has also launched the ‘Hello Britain’ brand in China which works with over 820 Chinese travel companies and exhibits at the four major Chinese travel shows each year, giving UK tourism attractions the ability to exhibit on the stand direct to Chinese travel organisers.
This is backed up by China Holidays large office in Beijing which offers UK attractions a representative office facility in China, partners who currently use this facility to boost their image in China include: St Paul’s Cathedral, Wimbledon Lawn Tennis Club Museum and Tour, Tourism South East, Shakespeare Country, Camp Beaumont, Historic Royal Palaces and theatrical promotion agency Dewynters.
Ends.
For more information please contact:
Carey Fletcher (Mr). China Holidays.

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Is there a song that describes a past or present relationship of yours ?
Mine with my partner is Push by Sarah McLachlan ...





Every time I look at you the world just melts away


All my troubles all my fears dissolve in your affections


Youve seen me at my weakest but you take me as I am


And when I fall you offer me a softer place to land





Chorus


You stay the course you hold the line you keep it all together


Youre the one true thing I know I can believe in


Youre all the things that I desire you save me you complete me


Youre the one true thing I know I can believe





I get mad so easy but you give me room to breathe


No matter what I say or do cause youre too good to fight about it


Even when I have to push just to see how far youll go


You wont stoop down to battle but you never turn to go





Chorus





There are times I cant decide when I cant tell up from down


You make me feel less crazy when otherwise Id drown


But you pick me up %26amp; brush me off and tell me Im OK


sometimes thats just what we need to get us through the day
Reply:an old country/western song called %26quot;Looking for love in all the wrong places%26quot; It was %26quot;our%26quot; song when I was married and I%26#039;m still looking in the wrong places
Reply:Awww, Rose, that is so sweet...


It sounds like you lost Gwen I%26#039;m so sorry.








My song with my HS sweetheart was Spandau Ballet%26#039;s %26quot;True%26quot;-- and I still think of that time when I hear it all these 20 some odd years later.
Reply:Im not in a relationship but my last one always bring song


%26quot;Love sucks%26quot; to mind.
Reply:Currently, outta my system by bow wow...





oh





(bow wow - speaking)





damn


i just keep thinking about you (oh baby)


i mean i wanna move on but i can%26#039;t move on (ohhhh)


it%26#039;s like you have some kind of hold on me and i don%26#039;t know (oh ohh oh ohh)


but imma go ahead and talk about it


listen





(verse 1)





i%26#039;m sitting looking out the window like damn


tryna fix this situation that%26#039;s at hand


you still running through my mind when i%26#039;m knowing that you shouldn%26#039;t be,


me all on yo mind and i%26#039;m knowing that it couldn%26#039;t be


cause you ain%26#039;t call and i ain%26#039;t even appalled


i still got allot of pain i ain%26#039;t dealt wit it all


i been running round with other chicks, i%26#039;m single and they loving it, i%26#039;m liking it but i just want the


one that i was in love with.


that%26#039;s not the end of it, i%26#039;m tryna let you know i can%26#039;t,


get a grip of it is what i%26#039;m tryna let you know.


you got a hold or some kind of control of me


i don%26#039;t know what it is, but i gotta get you gone from me


i%26#039;m working at it and it ain%26#039;t getting no better just tryna be like, yeah, forget it, whatever instead


of staring out this glass looking at this bad weather, damn i gotta pull myself together


cause...





(chorus - t-pain)





when i%26#039;m with somebody, all i think bout is you


when i%26#039;m all alone, that%26#039;s all i wanna do


i miss the smiling faces in my sidekick,


outta town visits, all the time we spent together makes it hard


to get you outta my system.


you know what you do to me (do to me)


you don%26#039;t even understand (damn)


you know what you do to me (do to me)


it%26#039;s so hard to get you outta my system.





(verse 2)





i%26#039;m too attached, my heart won%26#039;t let me fall back


i got it bad, that%26#039;s what you can call that (ah)


when i see you in the streets, that%26#039;s the worse for me


used to love the little things you did, that%26#039;s what works for me


it%26#039;s too major, don%26#039;t see you on my pager,


know what you doing, where you at, or can i see you later? (can i see you later?)


the fellas telling me %26#039;just let her go bow%26#039;, believe me, i%26#039;m trying man, i just don%26#039;t know how


(just don%26#039;t know how)


i be in all the top spots, leaving with the hot shots, knowing they just want me cause i%26#039;m in the top spot


that%26#039;s not poppin and my brain aint stopping, thinking


who she with, or where she going, is she club hoppin?


i never had this kind of problem in my life, this is my first time dealing with this kind of fight


it%26#039;s every night and every flight and every time you in my sight,


damn this aint even right, cause...





(chorus - t-pain)





when i%26#039;m with somebody, all i think bout is you (yeaa)


when i%26#039;m all alone, that%26#039;s all i wanna do (yeaaaa)


i miss the smiling faces in my sidekick,


outta town visits, all the time we spent together makes it hard


to get you outta my system. (ohhh)


you know what you do to me (do to me)


you don%26#039;t even understand (damn)


you know what you do to me (do to me)


it%26#039;s so hard to get you outta my system.





(hook - bow wow)





is it wrong for me to feel this way, you been running through my mind all day


can you feel me?


i been tryna get you off my mind, but i cant after all this time


that%26#039;s what kills me


is it wrong for me to feel this way, you been running through my mind all day


can you feel me?


i been tryna get you off my mind, but i cant after all this time


and it kills me





(chorus - t-pain)





when i%26#039;m with somebody, all i think bout is you


when i%26#039;m all alone, that%26#039;s all i wanna do


i miss the smiling faces in my sidekick,


outta town visits, all the time we spent together makes it hard


to get you outta my system. (hard to get you outtt)


you know what you do to me (do to me)


you don%26#039;t even understand (damn)


you know what you do to me (do to me)


so hard to get you outta my system





(bow wow - speaking)





i remember everything that me and you talked about


me and you had our whole lives planned out together (oh ohh oh ohh)


and if i could, i would, turn back the hands of time and correct all my mistakes that i ever did


but now i guess i gotta move on, right?


it%26#039;s still hard and i still love you till this day


peace.
Reply:Present relationship: AMAZED by LONESTAR ...





sorry about the loss of your love Gwen :(
Reply:Oh that%26#039;s so sad but so beautiful. I%26#039;ve passed this question on to Truckinotter so she can hopefully answer it too (but she%26#039;s in Michigan now and now I need a tissue...whaaaaaa.........)





Okay, I%26#039;m back now and it was several tissues.





It%26#039;s %26quot;So Happy Together%26quot; by the Turtles.





Imagine me and you, I do,


I think about you day and night, it%26#039;s only right


To think about the girl you love


and hold her tight


So Happy Together!





If I should call you up, invest a dime


And you say you belong to me and ease my mind


Imagine how the world could be so very fine


So Happy Together!





I can%26#039;t see me loving nobody but you


For all my life!


When you%26#039;re with me, Baby, the skies%26#039;ll be blue


For all my life!!





Me and you, and you and me,


No matter how they toss the dice it had to be


The only one for me is you and you for me


So Happy Together!





I can%26#039;t see me loving nobody but you


For all my life!


When you%26#039;re with me, Baby, the skies%26#039;ll be blue


For all my life!








repeat and add la lalalalalalalala....





I always sing it very loudly, especially on warm sunny days.


Love -- Otter.
Reply:Some days in our lives are a little tougher than others...I%26#039;m thinking of you, Rose.
Reply:Yes, %26quot; That Will Be The Day %26quot; by Buddy Hollie. 1958 or 59.
Reply:I know exactly which three songs remind me of my husband. The first is by Savage Garden:





%26quot;I know that it might sound more than


a little crazy but I believe





I knew I loved you before I met you


I think I dreamed you into life


I knew I loved you before I met you


I have been waiting all my life





There%26#039;s just no rhyme or reason


only a sense of completion


and in your eyes


I see the missing pieces


I%26#039;m searching for


I think I found my way home%26quot;





And another, by Sam Cooke:





%26quot;Now, Cupid if your arrow make her love strong for me


I promise I will love her until eternity


I know between the two of us her heart we can steal


Help me if you will





So, Cupid, draw back your bow and let your arrow go


Straight to my lover%26#039;s heart for me, nobody but me


Cupid, please hear my cry and let your arrow fly


Straight to my lover%26#039;s heart for me%26quot;





And last (this was the last dance at my wedding) %26quot;In Your Eyes%26quot; by Peter Gabriel:





%26quot;Love...I get so lost, sometimes


Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart


When I want to run away


I drive off in my car


But whichever way I go


I come back to the place you are





All my instincts, they return


And the grand facade, so soon will burn


Without a noise, without my pride


I reach out from the inside...%26quot;





I love all of those songs.
Reply:join me in death by HIM. he commited suicide, that was a good relationship though, just kinda dark.
Reply:Past relationship; Jay Sean - Stolen
Reply:%26quot;Looking for love in all the wrong places !!!!%26quot;





%26quot;Bad Moon on the Rise%26quot;....





%26quot; I don%26#039;t like spiders or snakes....but if that%26#039;s what it takes to love you...???%26quot;






Reply:When October Goes





And when October goes


The snow begins to fly


Above the smokey roofs


I watch the planes go by


The children running home


Beneath a twilight sky


Oh, for the fun of them


When I was one of them


And when October goes


The same old dream appears


And you are in my arms


To share the happy years


I turn my head away


To hide the helpless tears


Oh how I hate to see October go


I should be over it now I know


It doesn%26#039;t matter much


How old I grow


I hate to see October go





Reminds me of four sorrowful losses,


two children lost in autumn,


my grandfather, buried on Halloween and blanketed by snow the next day,


and one very special love - nameless here, but forever in my heart.
Reply:Tori Amos- Northern Lad
Reply:K well as you know im Probabley gay.. but i *thought* i loved my gf.... but she got mean and fake and we broke up... but it was kinda good cuz when we were going out i ignored my true feelings. Anways the song is Panic! at the Disco: Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off





%26quot;Is it still me who makes you sweat? Am i who you think about in bed? When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as youre sliding off our dress? Then think of what you did and how i hope to god he was worth it. When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as your fingers touch his skin. Ive got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better f*ck then any boy youll ever meet seetie you had me. Girl i was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of, exchanging body heat in the passenger seat. No, no, no you know it will always just be me.





Lets get these teen hearts beating faster, faster. So testosterone boys and harlequin girls, will you dance to this beat and hold a lover close? so, testosterone boys and harlequin girls will you dance to this beat and hold a lover close.

Similar posts: china dating

The global economy may begin recovering later in 2009 or in early 2010, but the latest data from the industrialized economies paints a murkier picture, with Russia, the Middle East, and many developing nations still spiraling downward. Amid historic uncertainty, world leaders must take bold action to prevent a depression. While China signals that its domestic stimulus has begun to take hold, the effects of the spending remain unclear. Expert contributors to Carnegie's new International Economics Bulletin weigh in on how policymakers in each region can do more to counteract the crisis.

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BEIJING, April 14 Wall Street Journal
Chinas $585 billion government stimulus programme appears to be kicking in, new data suggest, raising the chances that the worlds third-largest economy may be turning a corner.
Chinese demand for raw materials, hard hit in past months, is showing signs of recovery. Crude-oil imports hit a one-year high in March, the government reported Friday. Steel mills in March imported record quantities of their key raw material, iron ore, in anticipation of a pickup in demand in coming months.
Banks have extended a stunning 4.58 trillion yuan, or about $670 billion, of new loans in the first three months of the year, according to data published Saturday nearly as much as the 4.9 trillion yuan issued in all of 2008. And the stock market, which had been battered, is on the rise, with the Shanghai composite stock index gaining 2.8 per cent on Monday, pushing it to a 38 per cent increase for the year to date.
The signs augur well for the global economy. China has been one of the worlds most voracious consumers of raw materials. While its aggressive spending plan reflects the power of its state-dominated economy, there are signs that its thrifty consumers are starting to spend more.
Car sales hit a monthly record in March, according to figures issued Thursday, marking the third consecutive monthly rise. Housing sales in major cities have also picked up, with lower prices attracting buyers.
The optimistic outlook has spread to businesses. The National Bureau of Statistics said last week that its survey of managers confidence rose in the first quarter after plunging in the final quarter of 2008.
Overall, it appears that the states push has helped keep China from slipping into a downward spiral in which poor economic conditions and declining confidence feed off each other. The size of Chinas stimulus, announced in November, gets some credit for that: Along with the US plan, it is one of the largest in the world. But the vestiges of Chinas command economy have also proved useful.
China is unusual in that it has this incredible capacity to mobilise all its institutions, said Vikram Nehru, the World Banks chief economist for Asia. The governments ability to direct bank lending and investment spending has meant its stimulus efforts have worked faster than many initially expected.
There is now a growing degree of confidence that the stimulus package is having an impact, he added.
Beijings programme still has considerable work to do, with new data also charting continued contraction in the countrys export sector. The global slump in demand has battered exporters, leading to millions of lost jobs.
Exports fell 17.1 per cent in March from a year earlier, after a 25.7 per cent decline in February, official data showed Friday, a reflection of Chinas vulnerability to weak economies in the US and other export markets. That left a trade surplus of $18.56 billion for the month, far higher than Februarys figure but less than half the levels recorded late last year.
That is also being reflected in slower accumulation of foreign exchange reserves. New data from the central bank, released Saturday, showed the dollar value of reserves fell in January and February before picking up in March. They ended the quarter at $1.9537 trillion, compared with $1.946 trillion at the end of December.
Analysts say swings in the currency market also affected the headline figure for the reserves, which are held in multiple currencies but reported in US dollars.
But the government is pushing cash through the economy, and the state investment programme is driving new infrastructure projects.
Funds budgeted for investments that started in the first two months of 2009 surged 88 per cent from a year earlier.
While improvement in China alone isnt enough to reverse the global economic decline, it is still welcome news, given that China is one of the few major nations that is expanding.
Like China, the US government also has launched a significant fiscal stimulus, of $787 billion, the impact of which is only now beginning to show up in the economy as tax cuts swell worker paychecks.
US consumers their retirement accounts and home values depressed are showing a reluctance to spend as readily as they usually do. Car sales in the US, in contrast to the records being set in China, are extremely low. Spending on infrastructure is taking awhile to kick in, despite talk of shovel-ready projects.
Weaknesses in US banks and, even more, the near-paralysis of the important market for securitised credit, remain major impediments to renewed economic growth.
China needs support from demand in the rest of the world to sustain a recovery. Without that, it is still unclear whether Chinas economic engine, having been jump-started by government investment, can keep running in a higher gear.
Export manufacturing remains the primary employer of Chinas 140 million rural migrant workers. About 20 million of them are unemployed, and if the export crunch continues for several more months, that could exhaust their meagre savings.
Key to the effectiveness of Chinas stimulus plan so far has been a race by local governments to spend the money.
After Novembers stimulus programme gave them the go-ahead, authorities in the northern city of Harbin started expanding their port in March. The provincial government is trying to launch even more ambitious port works by October.
Thanks to the stimulus plan, our proposed projects get a lot of support from the central government, one official in Harbin said.
In central China, state-owned Henan Coal Chemical Industry Group started work on 15 expansion projects on April 1, declaring its planned spending of 22.4 billion yuan a response to the governments call to maintain 8 per cent growth this year.
That kind of reaction is partly why many analysts expect first-quarter economic data to be released this week to show activity picking up relative to the fourth quarter of 2008, even if headline growth rates remain very low by Chinese standards. The World Bank expects Chinas economy to expand 6.5 per cent this year.
I think its fair to say the economy has bottomed. But bottoming is not recovery, said Ben Simpfendorfer, an economist at Royal Bank of Scotland.
Among the reasons for economists caution before calling a recovery is that China has had at least one false dawn in recent months. In early anticipation of stimulus-related orders, domestic steelmakers started ramping up production in December and January, helping to push up prices and freight rates.
But the anticipated demand didnt materialise, and steel prices have been mostly falling since February.
The stimulus gets credit, at least, for stemming panic. Peter Li, chief financial officer of HLS Systems International Inc., a Beijing-based maker of industrial automation products, says he is getting orders from railroad projects as part of the stimulus plan.
People are not in as much of a rush to sell inventory. They dont expect prices to go down, Li said. The biggest impact of the stimulus plan so far is really on the psychological level.

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I'm sorry I have not posted something since I moved, but I have been busy traveling and working. These are some pictures of my new town, Lin'an. Lin'an is located about 30km west of Hangzhou, and about a 3 hr bus/train ride from Shanghai (I don't know for sure how far it is to Shanghai, I have not made the trip..) But I absolutely love it here in Lin'an. I wish would've come here when I first came to China! There are people my age that I can hang out with and they speak english pretty well. Much better than in my town in Shanghai. The town is much cleaner and much much much much more quiet. It is not overcrowded and it is very pretty. Surrounded by mountains as you can see from the pictures. The movie "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" was filmed near my town. The bamboo forests around Lin'an are bountiful! Yao Ming also had his wedding photos taken right next to my town!! Those are the 2 claims-to-fame in my town!

Right now I am teaching in 4 different primary schools in Lin'an. I work for an agency that places teachers in schools. The company that I work for is trying to get their curriculumn into these schools (and eventually build a school in the town) and I am more-or-less marketing for my company and their curriculumn. I am teaching much less now too. I am only teaching from 9:50-2:30 everyday (4 classes) which is absolutely amazing!! So much better than teaching 6 or 7 classes/day in Shanghai. The kids are much better behaved and its a lot more fun b/c I am really just playing games with the kids everyday!

Many of these pictures are taken from the top of this hill overlooking the town. The town is very small, with only a few supermarkets, 2 kfc's, no mcdonalds, and 3 bars. If you want something that is not local, you have to go into Hangzhou.

I am living on Zhejiang Forestry University on the outside of town. I am teaching one university class on Friday's for students who are potentially going abroad. The class is really casual (no tests, homework, or grading) and I have been told by the int'l office to teach them about western culture and practice their oral english. The class is from 6:30-8:30 on Friday. I am so suprised that the students even show up for the class. Because they will not receive a grade or anything and it is on Friday evening, I don't think I would be attending the class if it were in America! But many of the students seem genuinely interested in the class. I think they enjoy it because I am only 2 or 3 years older than them, so I think they feel more comfortable talking to me.
The picture of the track and football field is from my apartment. My apartment is located at the center of campus (which is really great). The student center is right across the street. I play ping pong there, as well as work-out in the gym they have on the second floor (although the gym is actually 2 big rooms with some random work-out machines!!) I'm right next to the supermarket on campus and the 2 best cafeterias.
The football/soccer field is right across the street and i play there often. Although I am really sick of the way chinese play football. They literally just cut the ball, back and forth, back and forth, and its SO frustrating sometimes (they aren't going anywhere, ...just back and forth!!) And the chinse ARE competitive, but when they play sports, it is always for leisure and not competitive, so i don't try and tackle hard! I have a few times when I'm just fed up and aggrevated with some chinese guy just cutting it back and forth, back and forth, but that usually ends with the guy lying on the ground...

But I have met so many people here! I always have something to do, whether its play ping pong, soccer, basketball, hiking, eating lunch or dinner, etc. I'm more-or-less a celebrity here (especially with the female population!!) This one chinese guy named Zhu, who works in the int'l office and speaks the best english i've heard since coming to china, always asks me every detail about my love life. He thinks the western way of dating is fascinating (i think) and he always tells me how lucky i am because I meet so many girls. I hope i don't corrupt his mind, because the chinese way is MUCH different than ours. But I have found a few cute girls who are out-going...

But the universities in China are absolutely NO FUN!! Every night, the students have to be in their dorm rooms by 11 o'clock. If they aren't in their rooms, they have to find somewhere else to sleep. At 11 o'clock on the weekdays, the university shuts off all power to the dorms....and doesn't turn it back on until 5:30 the next morning!! I have power 24/7, but I tell the students that if that happened in America, I think there would be riots!! And the school has no events or ways for students to meet other students. Its kinda lame for them I think. I tell my students and friends about university life in america, and they are speechless as to all the stuff that students are allowed to do. They're so interested and fascinated by how fun and exciting college is. It's unbelievable really. I could go on and on about this, but i will stop there.

I have learned more about china and the chinese culture in Lin'an (in 1.5 months) than i did living in Shanghai (for 5 months)!! I love it here and it has really changed my view of China.

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It's such a popular legend that if I write about the early history of tea in China without it, someone will tell the story of the accidental discovery of tea by the ancient Chinese emperor Shen Nung (2737 B.C.) into whose cup random leaves of the Camellia sinensis bush fell. I don't know where to look for the source of this legend, but it's a colorful, pleasant story that tea afficiandos know. In addition to staving off comments about the "history" of tea in China, I'm mentioning this legend to chronologically locate the following historical data. It may not actually be the first, but an early reference to tea comes from the third century A.D.

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What do you think? Do you like them?


The color of these nails is called Vintage Velvet. I love this color. It's extremely sexy. It's a vampy burgundy-brown with a very soft shimmer. One of those 'lit-from-within' vampy colors that I love so much.

My husband loves the color of these. He didn't notice that I was wearing fake nails! He looked at my nails and said, "Wow, that's a cool color." How about that!

The color is awesome- I wonder if Revlon makes this color as a polish? I'll have to look for it!

I have other likes and dislikes about this product.

I like the easy application, I like the sturdiness of the nails and the included glue is perfect. I like how long these nails last and how shiny they are. I also like that they are not damaging to my natural nail and also that they are not difficult to remove. The nails themselves are very thin and from a front view are not noticeably fake.

I LOVE the shape of these nails. They are, in my humble opinion, the perfect nail shape. Slightly rounded square, more commonly known as 'Squoval'. This shape looks good on just about everyone, and I find it to be the most flattering nail shape for people.

There are a few things I don't like about this product. The nails are too big for me- only two of the sizes fit my small nails and very curved nail plates. I am not very comfortable with how my middle and index nails look- they look too wide and unnatural compared to my natural nail. I now have a box full of artificial nails that are too big for me and I won't be able to use. I know that these nails are standard tip sizes, but I would love if the sets came in a 'petite' version which only had the smaller sizes, and maybe a new half size.

I'm also not comfortable with the length of these nails. The box states that they are medium length, and if this is medium, I can't imagine how short the short length must be! I understand that this length is perfect for most people- barely any free edge but enough to cover bitten nails. But for me? I prefer long nails. My natural nail plates somewhat long, which causes these artificial nails to be even shorter on me. This is just my personal preference. Longer is better to me.

Another minor imperfection in these nails is that they are perfectly straight and a little flat. I have a naturally strong C-curve and also nails that curve down slightly as they get longer. It is difficult to get the artificial nail to conform to my natural nail shape. If I get the tip of the nail to fit, the cuticle end pops up and leaves a gap and vice versa. This is remedied by applying extra pressure to the entire artificial nail, but you may end up with a little glue on your fingers by doing this.

One interesting observation about these nails: They make your cuticles look perfect! I think it's because they partially cover mine, to they appear smooth and invisible. Bonus.

These nails also get tipwear just like natural polished nails. I've been wearing them on my right hand for about three or four days now, and they're starting to show moderate tipwear. These nails can be re-polished, so that's not an issue. I just wish I had the same polish that's on these nails!

The polish on these nails does wear at the tips, but it does not chip. I can't imagine it being able to chip. It's like the polish is part of the plastic and is holding on for dear life. That's a good thing.

Overall, I really like these nails for situations that require a quick fix. I am definitely going to try out and review more styles of press-on artificial nails.

People who need to temporarily cover their nails to fix a broken nail or a breaking nail, but who don't know how to do their own acrylic nails will love these. I do prefer acrylic in this situation because it is more customizable and natural looking, but I know not everyone does.

They are perfect for protecting damaged nails that need to grow out, but are weak or painful.

People who also want their nails to look good for a special occasion but don't have the time (or patience or money, et cetera) to get a manicure or a set of acrylics should also try these. They are extremely inexpensive, there are a very wide variety of styles and colors and they're practically foolproof to apply at home.

What do you think? Would you ever try them.

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IN WHAT POSSIBLE WAY WAS THAT A RAW BEEF SALAD!? RAW might possibly suggest UNCOOKED certainly not MASSACRED to death by a deep fryer!? Salad? Generally in my books involves a vegetable or cold green of some kind? even a lentil or a pasta? A dish made entirely of fried meat is not by definition a raw salad.
Actually this is not just an issue of yucky food, this can be quite dangerous. Oftern I have taken out vegetarian friends in Shanghai, who have specific eating needs. For example I had a business partner whose face and neck swelled up like a puffer fish after eating onions in a quesidilla. I had repeatedly asked the staff to not include onion products, just the cheese and chicken and some ketchup. I had explained at length it wasnt enough to remove the raw onions but the salsa and sauce and guacomole had to be gone too. When she was gone to hospital, they simply answered "yes it was onion but it was cooked, you cant be allergic to cooked onion"
Great. Thanks for the info. Another great obstacle is vegetarianism, which is simply not quite understood here. I have had 2 great experiences of this. Once my vegan friend from London visited. Well, try explaining this to a Chinese server. I was told our options were egg fried rice and tomatoes with fish. Because fish of course grows on trees. In a country where spices and tofu and vegetables are such a high percentage of the diet I was shocked how little the servers understood vegetarian-ism. Hot and sour soup is a favourite of mine. Before and after my stomach surgery I was asked to cut down considerably on dairy and meat altogether, I began to love this tofu and spice gloopy soup. However, as with miso out here, the Chinese have adapted it to their own preference in each outlet and some hot and sour soups have chicken and pork. I always used to ask, but regardless the soup would come sometimes with and sometimes without. Cooks in local kitchen use what they want and find and you cant expect continuity it seems. Also this is not New York. I'd like to see you try sending back a dish in Shanghai.
I suggest sticking to 'picture' places, such as xinjiang restaurants and local mall places, most have a wall of very detailed graphics. The words don't mean a thing. "7 lucky treasures in a sauce of some note made like glutinous" This was one I read today. Well it could be 7 of the finest delicacies of the sea bed in a fine white wine and garlic reduction with a thick cream stock added to make it an amazing crab lobster and shrimp sticky soup. Or it could be 7 chickens feet in red hot chillies with paste. Its kind of up to the imagination, some idea of ingredients not just textures and history would help!?.

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Ch-ch-ch-changes.

I cut my hairs, and dyed them too. See icon. That's pretty much it, with shorter hairs in back. I also bought sunglasses, so the icon's even more accurate. yay. Also, I got this laptop named Archimedes which makes me all kinds of happy. That was a couple of weeks ago. I've all but stopped using my desktop computer entirely. It's so much easier to write on this little thing, and it's tiny. Acer Aspire One, linux flavour. What else. Oh, and I finally got a cell phone. That was actually a couple of months ago, but it's been a long time since I've done an update. I'm all up to date, until they come out with something else.

I haf also bin going on dates.

It's true. I don't actually like the brand new first date feeling, and I don't particularly like the boring could care less if we hang out tonight feeling. If I could bottle the middling we've been dating for a couple of weeks and I still like having you around feeling, I'd be set for life. I know there are people who swear by that first flustery butterfly-y feeling of nervous excitement, but I'm not one of them. I like it for two seconds until I think what a load of bullshit they're just as scared as I am, and then I start thinking about scooping them up and gently depositing them just outside the front door like they're a little spider I've got to man up and get rid of.

Which is probably not you know, the right way to think about it.

HOWEVER. I have been finding this recent bout of dating to be nice and relaxed and just the right amount of exciting, and I think it's because I don't give a shit about making Impressions or Presenting Myself. I just want to hang out, do stuff, have coffee, talk, and as long as that's what they want too, I'm cool. It's like dating for friends that may or may not eventually kiss you when you wink at them.

I have also been writing.

I wrote a short story, 3200 wds, a week or so ago. I like it. But I need to write more often if I'm ever going to like, have any chance at all of hitting the right editor with the right story. It's so subjective and hit or miss sometimes that I've really come to terms with rejection (I say that now, having never been rejected - let's just sit back and see what happens). I know it happens. I know it's like a bunch of stuff hitting all at once. But you still think, if it's good, it'll sell no matter what, and the truth is, if you don't find the market for it, it won't sell, no matter how good it is.

I may be wrong. In fact, I probably am. Things are too complex for anyone to ever be right about anything.

But anyway, I'm satisfied with the story.

I need to write more Rosebush though.

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China accused a U.S. naval ship of conducting illegal surveying off southern Hainan island, a Hong Kong TV website reported on Tuesday, after the Pentagon said Chinese vessels had harassed the ship in international waters. Global oil prices rose 3 percent on Monday, partly in a knee-jerk reaction to tension between the world's top oil consumers. But the confrontation was unlikely to do lasting damage to ties between two countries closely involved in trying to end the global financial crisis, a Chinese analyst said. The United States urged China to observe international maritime rules after the Pentagon said five Chinese ships, including a naval vessel, harassed the U.S. Navy ship in international waters. The Chinese vessels "shadowed and aggressively maneuvered in dangerously close proximity" to the USNS Impeccable, an unarmed ocean surveillance vessel, on Sunday, with one ship coming within 25 feet, a U.S. Defense Department statement said. The tropical resort island of Hainan is the site of a Chinese naval base that houses ballistic missile submarines, according to independent analysts. An unnamed spokesman for the Chinese embassy in Washington denied the Chinese ships had violated maritime rules and said U.S. ships had been conducting illegal surveying, the website of Hong Kong-based Phoenix Television (news.ifeng.com) reported. "The U.S. claim about operating in high seas is out of step with the facts," the report quoted the spokesman as saying. "The U.S. navy vessel concerned has been consistently conducting illegal surveying in China's exclusive economic zone," the station quoted the spokesman as saying. "China believes this contravenes international laws of the sea and China's relevant laws." Chinese authorities had "repeatedly used diplomatic channels to demand that the U.S. side cease unlawful activities in China's exclusive economic zone," the report added. The Chinese Foreign Ministry was unavailable for comment. U.S. defense officials said the incident followed days of increasingly aggressive Chinese conduct in the area, including fly-bys by Chinese maritime surveillance planes. It comes just weeks after the two sides resumed military talks, postponed in November after a U.S. announcement of arms sales to Taiwan, a self-ruled island China claims as its own. And it echoes a stand-off in 2001 between U.S. and Chinese military forces after a U.S. spy plane made an emergency landing on Hainan after a collision with a Chinese fighter jet. China released 24 crew after a U.S. apology. The dispute is unlikely to do deep damage to Sino-U.S. ties when both sides are grappling with the global financial crisis, but it suggests Beijing will take a tougher stance as its naval ambitions grow, said Shi Yinhong, an expert on regional security at Renmin University in Beijing.

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I know its been mentioned before, but I want everyone to take a close look at the list and tell me which songs you absolutely think belong on this list, and which ones have no business being on it.
100 Biz Markie: Just A Friend
99 Lil Jon The East Side Boyz ft/ Ying Yang Twins: Get Low
98 Warren G ft. Nate Dogg: Regulate
97 Eve: Whos that Girl
96 DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince: Parents Just Dont Understand
95 LTrimm: Cars With The Boom
94 Master P ft. Sikk, Fiend, Mia-x and Mystical: Make Em Say Ugh
93 N.E.R.D. ft. Lee Harvey and Vida: Lapdance
92 Yo-Yo: Cant Play with my Yo-Yo
91 Chamillionaire ft. Krayzie Bone: Ridin
90 Pete Rock CL Smooth: They Reminisce Over You (T.R.O.Y)
89 Camron: Oh Boy
88 Jungle Brothers: What U Waitin 4
87 Wyclef Jean ft. Refugee All Stars: We Tryin to Stay Alive
86 Heavy D. and the Boyz: Now That We Found Love
85 Black Star: Definition
84 UTFO: Roxanne Roxanne
83 2 Live Crew: Me So Horny
82 Chubb Rock: Treat Em Right
81 PM Dawn: Set Adrift On Memory Bliss
80 Three 6 Mafia ft. Paula Campbell- Hard Out Here For A Pimp
79 DMX: Ruff Ryders Anthem (Stop Drop)
78 Arrested Development: Tennessee
77 Cold Crush Brothers: Cold Crush Bros. at the Dixie
76 Big Punisher ft. Joe- Still Not A Player
75 Lil Kim ft. Lil Cease- Crush on You
74 EPMD: You Gots To Chill
73 Black Sheep: The Choice Is Yours
72 J.J. Fad: Supersonic
71 Whodini: Freaks Come Out at Night
70 3(rd) Bass: Pop Goes the Weasel
69 Common: I Used to Love H.E.R.
68 T.I.: What You Know
67 Mase: Feel So Good
66 House Of Pain: Jump Around
65 Spoonie Gee and The Treacherous Three: Love Rap
64 The Roots: What they Do
63 Kid n Play: Rollin With Kid N Play
62 Digable Planets: Rebirth of Slick (Cool Like Dat)
61 Slick Rick: Childrens Story
60 L.L. Cool J: I Need Love
59 Ol Dirty Bastard: Shimmy Shimmy Ya
58 Ludacris ft. Shawna- Whats Your Fantasy
57 Big Daddy Kane: I Get the Job Done
56 Busta Rhymes: Woo-Ha! Got You All In Check
55 Terror Squad ft/ Fat Joe and Remy: Lean Back
54 MC Lyte: Cha Cha Cha
53 Lox ft. DMX and Lil Kim: Money, Power, Respect
52 Foxy Brown ft. Jay-Z: Ill Be
51 Doug E. Fresh the Get Fresh Crew: The Show
50 Lil Wayne: Tha Block Is Hot
49 Boogie Down Productions: My Philosophy
48 Nas: One Love
47 Young MC: Bust A Move
46 De La Soul: Me, Myself, And I
45 Geto Boys: Mind Playing Tricks On Me
44 Method Man ft/ Mary J. Blige: Ill Be There For You/Youre All I Need to Get By
43 Game, The ft. 50 Cent: Hate It or Love It
42 Roxanne Shante: Roxannes Revenge
41 Funky 4 + 1: Thats the Joint
40 Run-DMC: Its Like That
39 Tone-Loc: Wild Thing
38 Coolio: Gangstas Paradise
37 Rob Base DJ E-Z Rock: It Takes Two
36 Nelly: Hot In Herre
35 Queen Latifah ft. Monie Love: Ladies First
34 Cypress Hill: Insane In The Brain
33 Bone Thugs-N-Harmony: Tha Crossroads
32 Puff Daddy The Family ft/ Notorious B.I.G., Lil Kim and The Lox: Its All About The Benjamins
31 Kool Moe Dee: How Ya Like Me Now
30 Tribe Called Quest: Check the Rhime
29 Digital Underground: The Humpty Dance
28 Ice Cube: It Was A Good Day
27 Beastie Boys: Hold it Now, Hit it
26 MC Hammer: U Cant Touch This
25 Fugees: Killing Me Softly
24 Eric B and Rakim: Paid in Full
23 Outkast: B.O.B.
22 Naughty By Nature: OPP
21 Afrika Bambaataa Soul Sonic Force- Planet Rock
20 Kanye West ft/ Jamie Foxx: Gold Digger
19 Ice T: Colors
18 50 Cent: In Da Club
17 Sir Mix-A-Lot: Baby Got Back
16 Missy Elliott: Get Ur Freak On
15 Eminem: Stan
14 Tupac: I Get Around
13 Wu-Tang Clan: C.R.E.A.M.
12 L.L. Cool J: I Cant Live Without My Radio
11 Jay-Z: Hard Knock Life
10 Kurtis Blow: The Breaks
09 Salt-N-Pepa: Push It
08 Snoop Doggy Dogg: Gin and Juice
07 Notorious B.I.G.: Juicy
06 N.W.A.: Straight Outta Compton
05 Grandmaster Flash the Furious Five: The Message
04 Run-DMC ft/ Aerosmith: Walk This Way
03 Dr. Dre: Nuthin But A Thang
02 Sugarhill Gang: Rappers Delight
01 Public Enemy: Fight The Power
Lil Trilla - shouldnt you be in class.

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In 2004, China submitted a request to the United States for import restrictions on archaeological materials, pursuant to the 1970 UNESCO Convention and the Convention on Cultural Property Implementation Act. At the public hearing held before the Cultural Property Advisory Committee, the Lawyers’ Committee submitted a statement in support of China’s request. On January 14, 2009, the United States and the People’s Republic of China entered into a bilateral agreement, imposing import restrictions on undocumented archaeological materials that belong to certain designated categories. The archaeological materials subject to import restriction represent China’s cultural heritage from the Paleolithic Period (beginning approximately 75,000 B.C.) through the end of the Tang Dynasty (907 A.D.) and monumental sculpture and wall art that is at least 250 years old. The designated categories of objects include bronze vessels, sculpture, coins, wall paintings, and objects of iron, gold, silver, bone, ivory, horn and shell, as well as silks, textiles, lacquer, bamboo, paper, wood, and glass.
Visit the Advocacy section for more information.

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The rate of illegitimate births in the British population is much lower than many people believe, a study says.It suggests an oft-quoted figure of one in 10 for the number of children fathered illegitimately is a myth.The real number is more likely to be less than one in 25, researchers say.The analysis looked at the connection between surnames and unique signatures on the male, or Y, chromosome in a sample of 1,678 British men.The study by Mark Jobling and Turi King at the University of Leicester is published in the journal Molecular Biology Evolution.Referring to the one in 10 figure, Professor Jobling told BBC News: "I think it is an urban myth. But it is very often said," Professor Jobling told BBC News.If you look directly at families without any prior suspicion of non-paternity, then you find a value of about 1% or 2%
Professor Mark Jobling, University of Leicester

He said he often asked audiences what they thought the real figure was when he gave talks, and the rate of one in 10 came up again and again."What we show is that it is likely to be much lower than that. If you look directly at families without any prior suspicion of non-paternity, then you find a value of about 1% or 2%."Strong connectionHereditary surnames were introduced to Britain by the Normans at the time of the conquest.The Y chromosome is a package of genetic material that, like a surname, is inherited from father to son more or less unchanged.But over time, the Y chromosome accumulates small changes in its DNA sequence, allowing scientists to study the relationships between different male lineages.It follows that men with the same surname might have very similar Y chromosomes. But adoptions, infidelity, name changes and multiple founders for one surname can cloud the picture.However, for the 40 surnames included in the sample, the results show a strong relationship between a man's surname and the characteristic markers carried on his Y chromosome.This suggested many British men who share a surname also share a common male ancestor in the last few hundred years. Further, the relationship gets stronger the rarer the surname is.This fact allowed the researchers to estimate the probability of "non-paternity", or illegitimacy, among men who share a particular surname.The study also sheds light on the demographic history of Britain.Men with common surnames, such as Smith, were no more likely to have such a common ancestor than men chosen at random from the general population.But men with rare surnames such as Attenborough, Haythornthwaite, Herrick, Stribling and Swindlehurst tended to have Y chromosomes that were very similar, suggesting a common ancestor within the past 700 years."Attenboroughs essentially form one big family of distant relatives," said Dr King. "The Y chromosome type was the same even across spelling variants, which confirms that the spellings of names were formalised only relatively recently."When they compared these patterns with data from Ireland, they found a higher proportion of men with common surnames, such as Ryan, O'Sullivan and O'Neill, showed common ancestry.Early historiesHowever, Professor Jobling cautioned against assuming that current patterns reflected the early histories of surnames and the men who founded them.Over several generations, some male lineages may die out altogether, while some men have better reproductive success than others - meaning their lineages become more common. This phenomenon is known as drift.Major historical events such as the Black Death and the industrial revolution could also have affected the picture.So assuming that names such as Attenborough were only founded by one person could be a mistake, said Professor Jobling.Simulations carried out by the researchers showed that the chance of one male lineage surviving from a single founder through 20 generations was just 9.6%.The study also uncovered evidence of African ancestry in some white Britons.About 39% of men with the surname Revis who participated in the study and 10% of men with the surname Bray carried a type of Y chromosome normally found in Africa.The practice of using hereditary surnames filtered down from Norman noble families to all classes of society so that by the fourteenth century people in many classes had surnames and by the sixteenth century it was rare not to have one.

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Bars can be filthy places...but not whore houses!

Some months ago I got an email from a Chinese female friend who recently relocated to Sweden for work. She was telling me about settling into her new country, that she loved most parts of her new life, and that she'd met a 'great guy' that she was dating.

However, there was one big dark cloud on her blue sky, and that was that the 'great guy' had a lot of Swedish female friends.

"Sometimes he hangs out with them for a whole day! I cannot stand it. I feel so jealous. Why are he seeing other women when he's got me?!"

They had only been dating for 2 months and already she was thinking about telling him to choose between his female friends and her.

"Do you think this is OK to say?" She asked me. "In China I wouldn't accept that my boyfriend had any other female friends if he was dating me."

I threw myself on the computer and wrote back to her saying "no no no NOOOOOOOO! It's not OK! He's probably known some of his female friends for years meanwhile he met you only 2 months ago! Of course he's going to choose his female friends! Why don't you try to get to know them yourself instead of just being jealous about it? Maybe they are really nice?! Besides, if they are his long-term friends he doesn't have any interest in them, otherwise they would have hooked up long time ago!"

But my friend refused to adapt to a culture where 'female friends' are considered OK, and broke it off with the guy. I haven't heard from her since then but I hope she's managed to move on and find a guy with no female friends.

Even though I can understand her reaction (where she is coming from, I totally believe that her boyfriend would get rid of his female friends if she asked him to) I still think she has some nerves, telling a guy she's been dating for a very short time that he should get rid of his friends. I mean, they weren't even living together! It's not a small thing to ask for I think.

Then, one of my male (laowai) friends told me about a mix couple he knows in Shanghai. An American guy married to a lovely, Shanghainese woman. They sound like the happiest, most joyful couple ever, and why?

"She wears the pants. Controls all their money. Gives him an allowance every month. And forbids him to go out and drink beers with his male friends. She doesn't want temptation to be put in front of him. In her eyes, going to bars is the same as going to a whore house."

Ah, OK, interesting. So I asked how the guy feels about all his restrictions.

"Ah he loves it. Saves a lot of money. And says he's sick of drinking anyways!"

Well, then, that's a prefect match!! Great that they can get along on something as sticky as that, I thought, until I heard about the guy going on a "trip to Hong Kong to renew his visa but ended up 'secretly bringing a good male friend' and partying for 4 days straight."

"So, what's that all about?" I asked.

"Well, it would be such a big deal if she would find out, so he didn't tell her."

Understandable. Totally understandable.

However, I keep asking myself:

Is that sort of relationship really a sustainable one? Where one comes up with the rules, and the other one follows them, but only 'most of the time' because quite frankly, they are too harsh? (I mean, every guy would like to have a beer with his mates every now and then, no?!).

I guess what I am trying to say with this post is that culture gaps when dating someone from a foreign country are always going to be large. But when is large too large? And what is OK to ask for? Would you guys give up beers with mates/ long time female friends if your girlfriend asked you to? Just because of culture differences?

My bf (like always) went against me on the questions, saying that the girl had all the rights to ask for these things.

"Oh really," I said. "So why don't you stop going out with your friends then for beers because I 'feel so bad' about that!"

"Eh.... well... no, I know you don't!"

"Well what if I did? Would you then give it up?"

"Not the same thing!"

Not the same thing? Really? I mean, if this girl is scared of letting her husband mingle amongst temptation, then why shouldn't I be?

I would really like to hear your guys opinion on this one, because I think the demands are too high, especially since the guy is already secretly going out with his friends (they have only been together for 2 years). What do you guys think? Can high demands be excuse with 'culture differences?' And is a relationship like that sustainable or not.

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